jueves, abril 29, 2010


I feel like explaining this one, because it can be highly misread. Since I am in the verge of oblivion and I don't want to keep a wrong track, this is also for myself, in the future... for when I look back and see what happened in my early years (Hello myself from the future!).

Can't you see that I'm sick of this?
Chances are you're oblivious
To how I feel
Sitting on your throne
And I'm sure that I'm not alone
Not alone
Not alone

I was not the only tricked person there. We were many, there are many right now, and odds are there will be many in the future. Even when this is quite awful by itself, that is not the main problem: the guy market himself at OUR expenses, he lies about girls: this one has cancer, this one was an orphan and I saved her, this one fell in love with me out of the blue (guide for the current girl: when he says "out of the blue" he means "I took her virginity and played the prince charming then disappeared without explaining her anything just playing depressive so she spent lots of energy on cheering me up when in reality I am banging someone else"), this one is a street kid that has nothing to eat so I help her economically, etc etc.
He is leeching OUR merit: on my case, he is basically taking credit for all what I've done BY MYSELF in the past, he said he inspired my art, and thanks to him I got better on my skill and I even "won some stuff" since he "took me out of the pit I was in" and "saved me from my mysery".
Literal words.
Complete lies.
When you confront him he is cynical enough to play the victim.

Tell me please
Who the fuck did you want me to be?
Was it something that I couldn't see?
Never knew this would be so political
And please
I'm still wearing this miserable skin
And it's starting to tear from within
But it's obvious that doesn't bother you
So please

The "miserable skin" is what I call Being Human, and I quite disagree on the "miserable" part. I like being human, I like to have nice emotions and been able to trust and love... problem is, I find it quite hard lately. I am conscious not all persons are the same, or behave the same. I am putting all my effort on keeping Kes away from all this, he doesn't even know the story, I promised myself I won't give him other people's crap to deal with anymore, I can do well by myself... and while I still trust him and love him, and he totally helps me on that part, I am afraid I won't be able to trust anyone the way I did before: just because, just out of pure faith in mankind. From now on, people has to earn my trust, and that is quite a shame... THAT is the Legacy Eero Lehtola is leaving.

I didn't think that you'd sell me out
Now I know what you're all about
You might feel in control of things
But you're not holding all the strings
All the strings
All the strings

Sooner or later, truth reveals itself.

I swallowed all your answers
I've swallowed all my pride
You've used up all your chances
Can't keep this all inside

Oh yes... because is so hard not to believe what he says to you until someone else comes and slaps concrete evidence at your face and you can't believe how can someone be that good on lying.

Don't keep telling me that it's okay
I don't buy all the shit that you say
And quite honestly I'm fucking sick of it
So please
If I cut off this nose from my face
Then I wouldn't feel so out of place
But it still wouldn't be quite enough for you
So please

This last part is quite unrelated :D

EPILOGUE: If you are a curious girl who fell for a prince charming who is not supposed to exist in reality and are hardly believing your luck, maybe you'd like to read this book:

Remember, if it looks too good to be true... probably is. Some interesting comparisons are found here: RELATED POST.
Stay Beautiful!

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